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9 Pure Genius Ways To Deal With The Annoying Telemarketers

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I don’t mean to be mean and bitchy. I know the poor things are just doing their jobs. But let’s face it, these time- bey time calls really piss you off and you just want to shout in the receiver and threaten them that if they call again it will be a bloodbath! But of course you can’t and won’t do that. So, here are some really terrific ways you can deal with these pesky telemarketers and be sure they will think a thousand times before dialling those 10 digits again!

1. The Deaf Roll

Ask them where are they calling from and pretend you can’t hear them. Shout at the top of your lungs ‘who is it?’, ‘sorry I can’t hear you’. ‘What?’…. And put down the receiver.

9 Pure Genius Ways To Deal With The Annoying Telemarketers

image source/ Eros International

 

2. The Slow Poke

When they call you again ask like a thousand times, ‘ok, so you are calling from where?’. ‘Alright, ‘V’ as in Van?’, ‘Wait a minute., whom did you say you are?’, ‘OK so let me get this straight, you are calling from ….’ and so on.

9 Pure Genius Ways To Deal With The Annoying Telemarketers

image source/ Yash Raj Films

 

3. The Bollywood Ma

As soon as they introduce themselves, burst out, ‘Ab tujhe apni ma/ baap ki yaad aayi’?!! Ab kabhi mujhe apni shakal mat dikhana. Tu aj se mere liye mar gaya.‘!! And put down the reciever.

9 Pure Genius Ways To Deal With The Annoying Telemarketers

image source/ Red Chillies Production

 

4. The Filmy Beat

Or tell them ‘Ramesh Babu tumne mujhe kahin ka nahin chhoda. Main ja rhi hu is duniya se door. Alvida.’ And if it’s Rashmi baby, say ‘Anuradha tumne mere sath dhokha kar ke acha nahin kiya. Main ja rha hu.’

9 Pure Genius Ways To Deal With The Annoying Telemarketers

image source/ SLB Films

 

5. The Godfather

Make them feel they dialled a wrong…a very wrong number. ‘Hello Bhai? Sab maal taiyar hai. Apun apko usich jagah mil jaega theek 12 baje‘. And put down the phone.

9 Pure Genius Ways To Deal With The Annoying Telemarketers

image source/ Dharma Productions

 

6. The Southern Connection

Simply take your phone and put it in front of your TV running some indecipherable song in a south Indian language at top volume. He also needs to enjoy after all.

9 Pure Genius Ways To Deal With The Annoying Telemarketers

image source/ UTV Motion Pictures

 

7. The P.K. Effect

Answer as if you are from an another planet. Make disturbing noises and speak in a seriously unidentified language. Main Youngistan se aaya hoon!!

9 Pure Genius Ways To Deal With The Annoying Telemarketers

image source/ UTV Motion Pictures

 

8. The KitKat Break

Put them on hold. Have a parantha subji roll, watch new movie trailers on YouTube or read a book. But don’t come back.

9 Pure Genius Ways To Deal With The Annoying Telemarketers

image source

 

9. The End of Discussion

Make this noise. Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeepppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp…………………………………………………………………… Well that’s it. Now sleep.

9 Pure Genius Ways To Deal With The Annoying Telemarketers

image source

 

Featured Image source/ Shree Ashtavinayaka Cine Vision Ltd.


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