I don’t mean to be mean and bitchy. I know the poor things are just doing their jobs. But let’s face it, these time- bey time calls really piss you off and you just want to shout in the receiver and threaten them that if they call again it will be a bloodbath! But of course you can’t and won’t do that. So, here are some really terrific ways you can deal with these pesky telemarketers and be sure they will think a thousand times before dialling those 10 digits again!
1. The Deaf Roll
Ask them where are they calling from and pretend you can’t hear them. Shout at the top of your lungs ‘who is it?’, ‘sorry I can’t hear you’. ‘What?’…. And put down the receiver.
When they call you again ask like a thousand times, ‘ok, so you are calling from where?’. ‘Alright, ‘V’ as in Van?’, ‘Wait a minute., whom did you say you are?’, ‘OK so let me get this straight, you are calling from ….’ and so on.
As soon as they introduce themselves, burst out, ‘Ab tujhe apni ma/ baap ki yaad aayi’?!! Ab kabhi mujhe apni shakal mat dikhana. Tu aj se mere liye mar gaya.‘!! And put down the reciever.
image source/ Red Chillies Production
4. The Filmy Beat
Or tell them ‘Ramesh Babu tumne mujhe kahin ka nahin chhoda. Main ja rhi hu is duniya se door. Alvida.’ And if it’s Rashmi baby, say ‘Anuradha tumne mere sath dhokha kar ke acha nahin kiya. Main ja rha hu.’